THE SENSELESSNESS IN HAVING A GIRLFRIEND

THE SENSELESSNESS IN HAVING A GIRLFRIEND

Abraham Maslows hierarchy of needs, recognizes social needs, vis-a-vis the need for association, companionship and social integration as one the vital needs of any human being.

This implies that humans by nature are always naturally feeling the need for friendship, relationship, and association. Now as humans we naturally also prefer to engage in activities that are gainful, and it would ordinarily amount to senselessness for someone to engage in any activity that is disadvantageous or not useful to him or her.

The question is, what do young men, boys or guys gain from having a girlfriend, i mean keeping, maintaining an intimate relationship with a girl or lady, whom they are not really sure will end up as their wife, what is the gain??

 People will quickly say that love does not look for gains, but i quickly say NO, by arguing that most of the times people especially ladies sing love and roll on the floor, the excitement is elicited by what they gain and are enjoying.

Ask a woman what she needs from a man, her first response is likely to be that she needs a man who can care or take care of her. CARE sounds romantic right, but the real word is SPEND.

I just thought of it, I may be wrong or right, but the question is, what do guys gain from having girlfriends?

I can figure out things they lose and a hundred thing the girl they date also enjoy or gain, but please what do guys gain from dating?

Guys lose money, I mean much money, in fact much more money. A low income earning guy may likely spend more than 50% of his poor income on his girlfriend to prove love and he remains under pressure to continuously please her at the expense of his personal welfare, especially if the babe is really cute and enjoys high traffic from other guys.

A senior friend of mine ones said that when you tell a girl that you love her and want her to be your girlfriend, you are indirectly applying to be her assistant father and you are also asking her to bring all her needs to you (at least that is what is obtainable in this part of the world NIGERIA). Could this be why we buy our girlfriends phones, laptops, provide most of their needs even while they have a guardian, but for what reason do guys do all these?. can someone see the senselessness in it?

If she is sick, its HIM, if she is broke its HIM, if she is hungry its HIM, Valentine, Christmas, New year, Easter, Birthdays, and i mean we guys do this happily and sometimes with sacredness.

Let me just figure out what we could think, SEX, do guys gain sex? is that a gain? who even enjoys more during sex? Note that girls enjoy sex the more, although guys feel the urge more. So without sacrificing much a lady or girl could have sex with someone she is used to, the degree of intimacy needed for a girl to let it out is directly proportional to the degree of her personal discipline. Some give it to people they meet for the first time, and others would not until you tickle them and make them laugh over time. but to say you have sex as a gain for dating is odd because even a mad man on the street is having sex too.

Guys lose time, energy, risk their health, and it is very distracting. A guy who has a girlfriend in school will likely not perform well academically compared to if he did not have, the distraction is just inevitable and it is so much, though with few exceptions.

A young bachelor who has a girlfriend will likely not achieve as much as he would if he did not have because he is indeed managing two lives and guys tend to spend more on girlfriends than the way people do spend on their wives.

I call it emotional investment, the less a person invest on his/her emotions, the more energy, resources and time he will have to invest in other things.

Well, I may be right or wrong like I said, but note that all these are just my opinion, may be it will be interesting if a lady or girl can roll out all she feels her boyfriend(s) gained or is gaining from dating her?